Tag Archives: relationships

your smile knows 

​skin so soft 
pale even as the sun
bestows a carefully placed kiss
you won’t look up
and i won’t speak up
you need to know
how the furrow of your brow
how the purse of your thin pale lips
how the ease of your laughter
how your fingertips find the top of my thigh
makes the voices melt into
the soft hum of the world’s noise
i can feel your gentle grasp
around my heart, easy pulse
when you do look up
your smile knows 

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seasoned fingertips

since having your
hands
on my skin,
in my hair,
fingers curled around
my own
it’s the only touch
i crave
seasoned fingers
weathered, endured
on the small of my back,
tracing the lines on my wrist
i could never
get enough
of feeling
your want
within your fingertips

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thank you

hey you

who i once loved

i hope you’re happy

i hope you’re good

but i’m finally ready

ready to say goodbye

for today

for tomorrow

for now

forever

thank you for helping

me become the person

i can truly love

i can be proud of

thank you

for letting me go

when i need to

the most

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intangible

when i close my eyes
squeezed tight
praying these tears don’t fall
i try to listen to
the whispers of the trees
as the soothing song of
the rain is no longer
yearning for something
intangible, unidentifiable
when i close my eyes
i think of you
holding me tight
letting unnecessary words
fall between the cracks
of our bodies

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weakness (is it you or i)

head to toe
surrounded
filled to the core
nested in the middle
of my chest
pressed against
expanded lungs
i carry you
in my skin
in my bones
in my veins
the moment you
put your hands
on my skin
these unsaid words
will fall from loose
lips
i never had a
perchance of keeping
secrets
never from you

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i never questioned

concentrated
pure and whole
i never questioned 
why
when 
happiness depended on
you 
second nature
never
second guessed
i couldn’t be 
if you weren’t 
unhealthy
yet
since i said goodbye
forced
footstep after footstep
eyes forward
back straight and stiff
eyes dry
like pops always
said
i tried to 
convince
myself 
happiness is
within
myself
days melted into
weeks into 
months into
a year
the face in the
mirror isn’t the 
same nor is this
smile 
i can’t seem to
erase
and to say it’s
entirely because of 
someone 
because of him
diminishes 
the days i locked away
myself
within
myself
but his palms are open
face up
towards the bluest of sky
rivaling his eyes
all i have to do
is let the key
drop 

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let you walk away

light is filtering in
slowly
the sun only beating
us by mere minutes
you’re racing
against some clock
i can’t see
but i sit back
sheets pooled just under
my chest
the cold air evident on
my skin
and watch you fight
with yesterday’s clothes
buttons slowly hide
the marks i didn’t
consciously 
mean to leave on
your pale skin 
fingernails indent
my favorite hip bone
faded teeth just above
your bellybutton 
dressed but perhaps
not fully ready
you climb onto the bed
marred sheets rustling
your face hovers
above mine
glasses framing 
tired but content
ocean blue eyes
press a kiss
against my lips
that doesn’t justify either
of our needs
of our wants
you’re already late
but i let you walk away
let you leave
with my red lipstick
lingering on your cheek
just above yesterday’s stubble

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cannot remember

i woke up
with the imprint
of your perfect
shaped lips
marked on my wrist
yet i cannot remember
your name.
your lipstick
bright and beautiful
stains pale skin
a reminder of
everything
i cannot remember.
but if I trace over
the mark you left
fingertips numb
i swear I can feel
the ghost of a memory
when you pressed
your lips.
i cannot remember your name
but i remember
you.

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too proud

i would trade every
compliment from unknown lips
for an embrace from familiar arms
strength evades
all that remains is the
weakness for you
deep within my chest
too proud to admit my wrongs
i swallow this like i do
my sorrows.
too proud to admit i am broken
beyond repair
beyond a thousand compliments
without you

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fathering

he reaches out
eyes wise and friendly
child come tell me
what’s wrong
tucking her fragile
against his strong line
years of weathering
years of strength
years of defeat
rolling off his skin
in waves like the sea
he took her twelve year old self to
she shakes her head
buried into his chest
nothing, pops, i promise
he doesn’t ask again
doesn’t know what or how
to make his baby girl
smile her mischief smile
age has nothing on parenting
twenty-five and broke
he doesn’t know why
but he doesn’t ask
he just hides her
against his body
from the world.

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